These photos are all by current Intern Marj. She moved here from Colorado for the three months of the internship – and even though it’s only been about three weeks, she seems to have gone through quite the range of emotions and experiences.
It’s a big risk and leap of faith for someone to move across the country to work with us – for free. The only thing we can do is try to make it worth their time – and even then so much of the value in this internship is dependent upon the actual intern doing more than what’s asked of them. There is very little hand-holding, and arguably very little instruction – and yet if you’ve read the reviews, you know that this is about these interns learning more about themselves as photographers – and less about photography 101. The only way that our program could possibly be worth the sacrifices that we ask for – is if it provides the opportunity for an experience that you can’t buy through a workshop or course at the local photography school.
Below are excerpts from Marj’s Intern blog over the past few weeks.
So it hit me the other day. The crying. The questioning if I’m really cut out for this or if I’m just extremely crazy. What made me think I was a good enough photographer that I could think about moving across the country for this internship? Ignorance? Naiveté? Whatever it was I did it and now I’m here. And whether it was a mistake or not I must move forward and make sure by the end of the three months it was the best decision I ever made. Still it’s scary. And it’s lonely. And I am not right now the photographer I want to be or imagined I was. It’s a real reality check. But I’ve got time, lots of it. I just hope I come out on the other side intact and things eventually get better.
Despite the set-backs and frustrations. It’s hard and I’m not sure you ever eliminate those aspects. But so far I’m on week two of experiment internship so I don’t think my perspective is representative or conclusive. So far I’m more blah and cranky than truly inspired.
Lighting 102 was frustrating. And not just because lights weren’t getting moved and stopped down and turned up without explanation. And it was because of that. Or just because it was freezing and rained buckets all day. Frustrating because when I finally got behind my camera I just heard the whirring of the lens as it attempted to focus and refused to allow me to take a picture. And I’m still cranky.
Most of this week I wondered why I was here. And if I should just pack up and drive the twenty something hours back home. My work so far has been nothing to write home about as they say. Nothing really special. Patience to push through the mediocrity. And the confidence to believe I can get beyond it because I want to. But at the moment I seem to have lost the proverbial trail of bread crumbs. I don’t entirely know where I’ve come from or where I’m going. And that’s part of my patience mantra. I try to tell myself to live more in the moment and stop my typical pattern of looking ahead. I’m a planner. It’s what I do. I like to plan things so I know there’s something up ahead in the future to look forward to and strive towards. It’s just who I am. But I’m getting the feeling I need to let go of that. At least for the next two months. If I plan too much I might constrain my final destination too much. Maybe close myself off to possibilities that could have happened if only I’d been less focused on the end result.
It’s empowering and frightening at once when I’m given absolute control over what I produce at a shoot. It’s pretty eye-opening to realize everything is orchestrated by you. I was surprised how much I liked it. The light adds an edgy quality and a crispness to the photographs that takes them to another level. I’m sold on the merits of simple lighting in the right situation.
And it was awesome. And I like having control. And I’m pretty stoked about these photos.
Atlanta. Photography. Internship. LeahAndMark.com